Friday, January 18, 2013


I decided to put an end to it.

I think I'm better off without it. 

Ok now feelings, dissipate! 

Yes, it is that easy. 


Ingat kau ahli sihir ke apa?

Tak, aku bukan ahli sihir.

Aku minta tolong pada Tuhan.

Sendiri, aku tak mampu. 

Aku tak pernah mampu sendiri. 


I'm only human, I'm not God.

It's natural that some things are too much to handle.


I need to let go of some things.

Then I'll have room for better things.

And when that time comes,
Make me content with it O Allah.

This year, there's so much snow. Alhamdulillah for that. 


Qilah now babysits Farish and Farisha. Adorable little things they are. :) 

Anyway, today I wanna thank Mama and Abah. I carried Farisha today, across town, and though it was a short trip, my arms got really exhausted. So exhausted I couldn't even bring myself to write things down. (Hooray for handheld devices!) 

I thank you both, for not giving up on me and Hana (anak sendiri kan :P) though times must be hard, what with having to study, and work part time for us. I baru carry anak orang pun dah lenguh, Mama and Abah, korang memang wonderpeople lah! And Mama always said she would feel sad every time they leave us at the nursery cause I would be crying dengan muka drama queen sedih sangat-sangat (pastu dah besar suka sangat bersendiri, buat eksperimen tak tentu pasal. Cis, kacang lupakan kulit! :P). 

Thanks for bathing us. For showering us with lotsa love. For teaching us how to pray. Honestly Mama, I remember wearing T-Shirt and pants, then reciting the prayer out loud, in your room. Thanks for teaching me how to have the perfect ponytail. :) And in primary school, for cutting the black ribbon every day, for I always lose the ribbon. For allowing me to play fortress and sofa-horse-riding as long as I clean up before Abah gets home. And for the lovely dresses. Kekeke. I think I miss you buying us those really beautiful maxi dresses, Abah. Somehow you and Hana have the knack for good things. I hate having to buy clothes on my own actually. :( Thanks for taking us out buying our first heels and recommending the stilettos which I couldn't wear anyway cause I can't feel the ground with it. And bearing with us and bringing us to all the shoe departments so that we can find "the one". Thanks for triggering our interest in sports, and not the ones they have in school :P Miniature golf is sure something to remember forever. For taking us to the driving range, which, up till now, I still have not seen the point doing. :P The weekly badminton sessions at the stadium. I've always loved that. And now, cycling. 

And then, there are the other things which I couldn't quite remember but I think I must write at least those above for today. 

Missing you more than ever, 


dr1/6 said...

beautifully written.

i miss you loads zipau. i read everything here, but sometimes takda words to comment.

hope all is good with you!


nora~zizi said...

hee~ and I'm your regular!

not all is flowery but, surviving, thank God!