Wednesday, October 31, 2012

neon jeongmal ukkyo

Too straight, too high.
Sanggwaneobso.
Nan naega joha.

:)

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Dallado dwae.
Michyeodo dwae.
Nan naega joha.

:)

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Naega wonhaneun nawa.
Nan neomu dalla.


Mwol bwa? 

Never stop from being who you are. 
The world's standard is too high/too straight. 
You're fine, really. 

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On a different note,
Can't wait for a new album to arrive. ^^,
It's by one of the three musicians whom I adore: my bestie, Jason Mraz, Epik High. 

Sunday, October 28, 2012

pathological

In an attempt to escape a life I've lived, I grew more confused.

The most precious advise from a friend by far was, to return to Allah.

So it's good to know that really, eventually, if you do things with the right intention, then good things will come out of it. Be it in a week, a month, a year, longer.
Worrying halts. Blaming halts.

The pathological reaction isn't so malignant right now anyway, so lets hope for the best :)
And even if you can't break through, it's not a problem, it's just the way you are.

Besides, God gave you friends and family who knew and did not judge nor leave you behind. It's not a lonesome journey after all.

Baiklah.
To yet another start, Bismillah.

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Yesterday I felt like the whole world was against me. When in fact, it was only 4 out of the world population. Bergurau ada tahapnya. You needn't be so harsh. Try walking in my shoes, and try to laugh it off. It's doable, but never easy. Especially when I'm freaking tired like yesterday. :'( Meanie.


Thursday, October 18, 2012

fwp


Is mainly ego.
The sense that you can't be hurt, can't be bothered.
Ignorance. Apathy.
:(

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TCV, and I'm not recommending the book. It's filled with ugly truths. You may end up nauseated reading it. In fact, I think everyone is just so messed up there. Everyone is inflicting harm on just about anyone. It's bound to happen, when all you care about is yourself (perhaps?)
A disrupted way of life but reality none the less.

It was very depressing reading the book (remind me not to do something so dangerous again) and I was feeling uncomfortable so I decided to calm myself with NAK's talk. *Alhamdulillah for the existence of this man. I think he helped a lot with my trying to be more acquainted with the Quran. May Allah's blessings be always upon you, brother!*

The title of the talk was: Returning To Allah. (downloadable here!)
This, I recommend listening to. :) I think it touched a lot on the problems we face nowadays. And truth be told, I think it cleared pretty much all the conflict in TCV.

A gist of what I got:
No matter how messed up we think we are, don't EVER lose hope in Allah's Forgiveness (Allah is Extremely Forgiving) and His Mercy (Allah is Always Merciful).

39;53-54
It is very common for us to shun away from people we have disappointed. How we can barely look in the eye of our friends when we know we made a mistake etc. but just what are our bad deeds to be compared to His Mercy. To sin is only to harm ourselves, and here Allah tells us to return to Him, regardless, before it's too late.

The talk also touches on us, youth's biggest problems: having little respect of our parents, and over exposure to shamelessness. And how to at least spend your time not doing harm.

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Oh, I have yet again decided to not take my exam but insyaAllah, will take it in a month's time. By the time which, I'll have another, smaller exam. :)

I know people are praying for me and I thank you very much for that, and please keep me in your prayers always! ;)

Have a nice Zulhijjah everyone!

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

untitled

:D So this post came on FB today.
On ladies going to the mosque (click to watch)

Hee~ Seriously, my summer trips to Surau KK was awesome actually.
Thank God Abah is okay with us pergi surau. Hehe. (And pergi shopping *quote Abah when Mama said we all asyik beli tudung/baju "takpelah, benda baik"* or makan-makan)

Faith in humanity, restored! :)
Hee~

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By the way, today I felt the awfulness of having to go out of your comfort zone.
Nauseating.
One has to do it however, the whole being uncomfort thing.
Change or die.

Oooh that was harsh.

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Haha.

Lets not get too overwhelmed! Work through this challenge with sabr Nora! ;) We'll get there. Slowly but surely. iA.

Sunday, October 14, 2012

na shledanou, NOT part II

Okay, I'm taking up the challenge.
I'll see you this coming summer.

Then, we'll hit Street Cafe, Seoul Garden and the likes.
And talk of all the challenges life offers.

Uri dong saeng, ittabwa!

Zizi Unni.

Saturday, October 13, 2012

dreams

I have this random dream.
To live in the US.

I remember Americans as really friendly people. Maybe because the neighbourhood we used to live in was a safe neighbourhood.

Anyway, what caught my attention was the Youtube videos by the Muslim committee there.

Seeing the Muslim committee there online makes me feel like "hey, that's actually a good society to live in".

Prolly cause they're more open to discussions. Prolly.

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However, other responsibilities await in my country :)
Maybe our generation can get ourselves more involved in the betterment of our society. :)

Thank God for the opportunity, to have experienced living in so many places in this short termed life. To be open enough to allow new perspectives, firm enough to go by my stands.

At least I can enjoy living in a standard I would figure as not too much, not too little. Hee~

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

hmmm

The post below, regarding the ape librarian was an attempt at clearing some thoughts. However, I feel that I need to make my blog posts more meaningful :P

I thank God to have surrounded me with good people, cause almost anywhere I am on the internet, I could click on motivating things.

And today is regarding waking up. Waking up together. Here's a Youtube link from an educator I admire, Brother Nouman Ali Khan, regarding the subject, waking up.

A reminder on getting back on track, and surrendering ourselves to the right thing.
Cause sometimes having faith is not enough, you need the right attitude as well.

Eep~
This year is about battling many things. I hope to be aware of where these all leads to. And I've been warned this journey may be the most challenging yet, so yeah, lets work hard. :)

With Allah's help, we'll manage.

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*below is the said blog post that needn't be read, cause to many, it doesn't make any sense whatsoever*

Oook Oook!

And she wonders how many would smirk at the remark.
The librarian lost a friend.
So the librarian buries itself in more books.
A book comforts the way a friend can not.

And to a banana, the librarian went: "Oook!"

Works every time!
Cause the thing about a banana is that, a banana, is not just a banana.
It kept the library at balance.

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Sunday, October 07, 2012

93 miles

Weekend means calling home, and I managed just that.

Mama ask if the green-box-yet-to-be-named is in good condition, and thank God it is.

I dropped it together with my laptop at the airport when I was heading back to Prague. At some airport cafe. Abah put on the 'what in the world has my daughter done?' face and helped replaced my laptop bag unto a chair.

It was after I got my drink that I realised he also made the effort to tie my bag to the chair. That's family for you, he knows I tend to lose focus so he added preventive measures, in order that I won't repeat the mistake. T'was a small matter that meant big to me. Maybe cause when I was younger (tak nak mengaku tua. Haha), instead of a protective measure, I would be blamed and scolded for my clumsiness. Needless to say, I was thankful sebab kena marah itu serius tak best.

If they knew that I dropped the green box dekat JPA briefing jugak, it'd be so funny. Hahaha. I had to suppress the urge to tell Mama I did just that.

Anyway, exam is coming soon, that's why I'm writing again.

And this being the last year (insyaAllah) and all, random thoughts just pop out of no where in my head.

And an ironic random thought that keeps bugging me is how I feel like I'm in first year again. Excited. And a lil' anxious. I hope the anxiety would tone down, cause I think it's making me a lil' selfish these days. Yikes.

Now that the bottled up feel has been spilled, lets Magrib~ and teruskan berusaha.

*kalau tak susah, why would they wanna call this final year kan? Just do it yaw~*

but of course

Bismillah So, it has been done. A visit to the mental health practitioner. Starting therapy and new medications. Perhaps a flaw in the pl...