Saturday, May 27, 2017



Ramadan is a month to develop new habits, and get rid of the ugly ones.

I moved to a new place, as the memories of the old one grows ancient.
(Pun intended, the old house is aged, poorly maintained, and a threat to my health. I do not have as good an immune system like the rest of its inhabitants. Sorry dear body, for forsaking you over things that don't matter.)

Grew close to people whom are willing to understand and not punish me for being who I am. I come to realize some red flags, of the relationships I should not forego, that is, when people tell me to change, or ask of my change, or blame others for changing me, refusing to hear what I have to say. I vow to be more honest, with who I am, cause a lot of love is lost if I were not.

And I am so thankful to Mama, and the siblings, for loving me, regardless of the jumble of irregularity I could come out with (read: hyperactivity). I know you are here now, but one day you will leave and I hope I do not have to be alone the rest of my life (but he has to be funny, energetic, clean, dream big, support my dreams, not selfish, optimistic, loves nature, good looking, has broad shoulders and is taller than I am). Or I hope I have done enough good in this world by then, so I can peacefully move on to the next life, and never experience the pain of being alone.

Studying is in progress, thank God it finally did, that was one long transition I took. It helps that there are juniors interested in the field, so I could part whatever little knowledge I have to them, enhancing my own understanding in the process. Still over the fence about taking the exam in August. So darn expensive! A sponsor would be nice this time around. Study I shall, nevertheless.

Getting in touch with a platform to publish my own book. Hope I can straighten things out and make it happen.



Getting my high again,

Sunday, May 07, 2017

no shit


Am learning more about myself, and it is a lot of fun. Haha. Cause it just makes it easier to let go of people with so much expectations. And forgiving oneself for having a differently working brain. Yeay!

Thank God!

Saturday, May 06, 2017

letting go


It sure was not easy
At least in the beginning.

Leaving your heart
At the hand of a stranger
Whom failed miserably
At seeing its beauty?
Definitely the act of
Reckless, not romantic.

It has taken place
And you learn to embrace

The wounds heal,
And regrets find forgiving.

You find a new you
After every mistake
And made a vow
In your defense,
Not to hurt
The same way again.

And that is okay
Cause you also found Love
That is true
Love that gets you through
Love that always awaits you.


Dear God,
Thank You for the lessons learnt, and thank You for sending me abundance of Mercy, and made ease what I thought would shatter me to pieces.
Thank You for showing me to be kind, and not to expect anything in return, and to be grateful, and to thank You by thanking others.
Now I ask to make ease, what is good for me, and the people around me, and the world in general. Make ease my wish to be a vessel of mercy, on my short stay in this world.

Thank you.